Cleveland Singles Scene by It's Just Lunch

Gina Shares Her Advice On Making A Great First Impression

This week is National Etiquette Week, the national recognition of etiquette and protocol in all areas of American life- business, social, dining, travel, technology and of course, dating. We asked the matchmakers to provide some dating tips and dating etiquette advice to our blog readers. Today, Gina shares her advice. 

You only get one chance to make a great first impression, so I have compiled a few things to help you out!

Tip #1 Mind Your (Table) Manners!

This seems so cliché, but the fact of the matter is that people tend to overlook just how important this is while dating.

• Keep your cell phone turned off and put away. Your attention and focus is on your date NOT on emails, texts, or phone calls. It can wait!
• Don’t talk with your mouth full, and definitely do NOT chew with your mouth open. I guarantee your date will appreciate this! Take smaller bites, and you’ll be able to keep that conversation going without skipping a beat.

Tip #2 Be Conscious of I, I, I and Me, Me, Me!

• Don’t brag! Being a show-off is not only rude, but it’s also a turn-off and just plain boring. I’m sure you are a fantastic individual with a lot to bring to a relationship, but it’s much more exciting and appealing for the other person to find that out on their own.
• Matters about money should only come up if/when the relationship advances to a more serious level.
• Do NOT dominate the conversation! If you’re doing all of the talking, how are you possibly expressing an interest in the person across the table from you? Pay attention, absorb the conversation, ask questions, and LISTEN more than you speak.

Tip #3 The Ex.

• This is never an appropriate topic of conversation for a first date. Period. As much as you may think it would make for a great story, nobody wants to hear about it, especially when you are trying to get to know someone new. This is FOR SURE a mood killer, and will also terminate any chances of getting that second date! 

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Our matchmaking team is working with great singles and with spring here and summer right around the corner, it’s a great time to meet someone! Plus, we take the hassle out of dating and you deserve to have some fun! For more information, email Gina or give her a call directly at 216-328-9027.

 

Grace Shares A Dating Tip

This week is National Etiquette Week, the national recognition of etiquette and protocol in all areas of American life- business, social, dining, travel, technology and of course, dating. We asked the matchmakers to provide some dating tips and dating etiquette advice to our blog readers. Today, Grace shares her advice. 

Tip #1: Show up as your best self...leave the day behind you, listen to positive music that makes you FEEL good on the way to the date. These little things will really help you! 

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Our matchmaking team is working with great singles and with spring here and summer right around the corner, it’s a great time to meet someone! Plus, we take the hassle out of dating and you deserve to have some fun! For more information, email Grace or give her a call directly at 216-328-9028.

Deadly Dating "Don'ts"

We came across this article on the Huffington Post about the “seven deadly dating sins”. The list of “dating don’ts” can ruin your chances at success in dating and relationships while also help you land a 2^nd date and help in your overall dating success after a divorce. Our office picked out a few of our favorite sins to share with you: 

Impatience. Chances are you won't find love on your first date. You probably won't find it in your first month, or even your first year of dating after your divorce. If you're serious about finding love again and you're doing everything possible to change ineffective dating patterns, it's important to be patient. You can only control what you can control (taking responsibility for your actions and your emotions). The rest is out of your control. So stay proactive and be patient. Impatience comes across as neediness, and that can be a love repellant. Good things come to those who have a great attitude and let go of love coming in one specific package. Your partner might show up in a way that surprises you. So, be open and patient.

Self-absorption. You can be self-absorbed without being totally selfish. Whether it's from insecurity or nervousness on a first date, work on increasing your self-esteem. If you talk incessantly about yourself on a date and don't listen well or ask enough questions, you will turn off your date and ruin your chance for a second date. Learn to listen. Your date will think you're the best conversationalist.

Lying. Character matters more than almost anything else in a relationship. Don't lie. Period. Not about your age, weight, or anything else big or small. You have nothing to gain and everything to lose. That doesn't mean you get to disclose all of your deep secrets on a first or second date either. Keep the darker stuff to yourself until you're in a relationship. Your date doesn't want to hear about your bladder surgery until he/she likes you enough to care about all aspects of you.

Envy. Jealousy is ugly. Maybe you're jealous of an ex moving on, or you envy a friend who seems to have better luck in dating and earns more money than you. Instead of focusing your energy on begrudging how well they're doing, let other's successes inspire you to try harder. Don't bring that green monster of jealousy to your date. It's a total turnoff.

To check out the other dating sins, click here. 

A Few First Date Tips

First dates include butterflies, nerves and jitters. We don’t want to complicate things with too many rules but want to share a few tips that will get you through the first date and hopefully lead you to a second one. Good luck...and don’t forget to smile!

DO show up on time. First impressions count and being late is a surefire way to start the date off on the wrong foot.

DO look your best. This shows your date you’ve actually put some effort getting ready for the date, so dress to impress.

DO be courteous. Being polite and well-mannered shows your consideration for others. This includes the wait staff too!

DO Listen. Always pay attention to what your date is saying and ask follow up questions. This shows you are interested in the person sitting across the table from you and could even lead to second date ideas.

DO give compliments. Giving a genuine and positive compliment is a great boost and can help calm first date jitters.

DON’T be something you’re not. Trust us, your date will find out. Don’t be fake or lie about something. Be yourself!

DON’T use your cell phone. It’s rude and a major turnoff.

DON’T talk about your ex. Leave the past in the past and focus on the person sitting on the other side of the table from you. 

Spring Fling or Real Relationship? The Dos and Don'ts of having the 'What Are We?' talk

If you have been dating someone for a while and starting to wonder what your relationship means and what your status is, check out some of the Do’s and Don’ts of having the “What Are We?” talk that we found on MSN Living. Our favorites include:

DON'T feel like you have to have the talk if you're happy with the way things are. Everyone has a different "right" time to have the "what are we?" talk.

 DO look for signs he's ready too "Men generally communicate through their actions more than their words, so to gauge his interest, look at what he's doing, or not doing, to show he's interested in a relationship," says Andrea Syrtash, author of He's Just Not Your Type (and That's a Good Thing). "Is he making regular plans? Has he introduced you to people important to him? Take that as a sign he’s ready to move to the next step.

 DON'T let a few drinks initiate the conversation. 

 DO have the conversation face-to-face. As tempting as it might be to talk about this via phone, text or email, make sure you talk about this in person.  If you do want to have a relationship, then maturely discussing things in person is the absolute best way to start things off.

DON'T feel like the conversation has to be serious just because the topic is. "The talk shouldn't be heavy and pressure-filled," says Syrtash. "If you want to tell him or her you see more potential, you can let them know in a fun and upbeat way. You can let them know you put your membership on hold or took your online dating profile down. That may open up the conversation. If they respond “Why would you do that?” that’s probably a sign they aren’t ready yet. If they smile and says they’ve done the same, the conversation will flow much easier.

For more do’s and don’ts check out the rest of their tips here.

Congratulations to Jonathan and Elizabeth…our latest success story!

Jonathan and Elizabeth were both in their early 30’s when they joined It’s Just Lunch. They both have busy careers (Elizabeth is a Pharmacist and Jonathan works in Commercial Real Estate), had never been married, didn’t have children and were meeting people thru friends. Both were nervous to join and had never tried anything like this before. Elizabeth ultimately decided to join It’s Just Lunch because she was sick of meeting “stupid guys” and really wanted to meet someone of substance to share a long-term relationship with. Jonathan wasn’t meeting the right type of girls and was annoyed with his friends harassing him when he was going to meet “the one”.

Jonathan and Elizabeth met at the Chop House in early September 2010 and hit it off, both found each other easy to talk to, attractive and they exchanged information, both hopeful for a 2^nd date. They continued to date, put their membership on hold for each other a month later and continued to explore their relationship together. While making gingerbread cookies, Jonathan proposed on Christmas Eve 2011 and they were married this past October.

Both Jonathan and Elizabeth agreed their paths would never cross without IJL and advised giving a dating service a try. When asked about their favorite part about dating through us, Elizabeth noted, “I met a lot of different men and had a great dating experience! Also, IJL made it very easy and comfortable.” Jonathan agreed, “I liked how easy IJL made it for me, they do everything for you!”

Gina, their matchmaker was thrilled to receive the wedding photos with a note of thanks for introducing them. She noted that, “Elizabeth was a catch! She was intelligent, fun-loving and a beautiful girl that had a lot to offer. She needed a gentleman who would respect her family, friends and appreciate that she was driven in her career. Jonathan was just the type of man she desired on so many levels. He was serious about the process and he was looking for a respectful, family oriented and educated woman to grow old with.” Elizabeth was Jonathan’s second date with It’s Just Lunch and Gina remembers the excitement of receiving their feedback from that first date, it was the perfect match!

A big “thank you” to Jonathan and Elizabeth for sharing their story and pictures with us. We wish you a lifetime of happiness and love, it was a pleasure working with the both of you!

  

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For more information on dating with It’s Just Lunch, contact Gina via email at gina@ijlmidwest.com or give her a call directly at 216.328.9027.

 

 

Bored With Your Standard Date Nights? We Have New Ideas For You!

We came across this article from Redbook on 50 date night ideas and decided to share it with our blog readers. They have some great ideas to change up your standard dinner or movie dates! With the weather warming up, they have a lot of great ideas to get out and do something fun and unique.

We took a look at their list and picked our Top 5:

1.) Venture Into The Kitchen: "We love Taco Tuesday; we try different main meats and experiment with flavors," says Chicagoan Erin G., 29. "It sounds simple, and we've got the prep-work down to a science, but because we don't have to concentrate on the task at hand, we can really enjoy being with each other."

2.) Sign Up For A Mud Run or Color Run: Dirt — and lots of it — is the pervading theme at these non-competitive fun runs spouting up around the country. They often require you to work in tandem, which is an awesome way to bond, and the finish-line sometimes stocks celebratory beer tents for thirsty participants. To find one in your area, log on to Active.com.

3.) See An Improv Show : Still mourning the end of 30 Rock? Ease the pain by grabbing tickets to a local improv show, where you may catch next decade's Tina Fey, Aziz Ansari, or Amy Poehler before they hit it big. Not only is attending these shows generally way cheaper than buying seats for "traditional" theater, the improvisers often ask for audience participation — and sell beer in the back.

4.) Document The Night: Head to the pub around the corner, hit the coffee bar for dessert, or just grab takeout — but be sure to take plenty of fun, artsy or silly Instagram pictures. Not only will it create an awesome memory, but studies have shown that looking at photos of your significant other can make you feel even more connected to them, so find a favorite and print it out.

5.) Play Strangers In Your Own Town: In Roman Holiday, Audrey Hepburn plays a princess in disguise who ends up spending her day with a sexy journalist (Gregory Peck) who knows who she is, but doesn't reveal it so he can get a scoop. While role-playing is optional, spending an afternoon exploring a nearby city (having lunch at a cool bistro you've never been to because it's full of tourists, taking a walking tour of a local cemetery, or having your picture taken together by a town landmark) is a great way to see your world — and each other — in a whole new light.

Calling vs Texting: Why Singles Text First Despite Their Preference to Call

In a recent survey, It's Just Lunch asked 2,901 singles about their dating and technology habits. The results revealed:

-72.4% of singles are more likely to text someone first after swapping numbers vs. 39.9% who are more likely to call

-65.8% of singles actually prefer a phone call vs. 40.9% of singles who prefer a text

It certainly come as no surprise to learn that the younger the single, the higher the preference for texting while the older the single, the higher the preference for calling. Despite the differences in age, most singles all around definitely prefer calling over texting. It’s Just Lunch offers some possible reasons why so many singles are texting first despite their primary preference for calling.

Convenience. For professional singles who lead very busy lives, texting is a matter of convenience because it allows them to multi-task. They can send a text message while they are keeping busy at work, going out to lunch or heading toward the gym. It’s a quick and easy way to start a conversation.

Intimidation. When it comes to shy singles, texting creates a comfortable barrier between themselves and the person they may be too shy to connect with on a personal phone conversation. There’s also less pressure to be witty or quick on your feet when you have time to think before you text.

Fear of Rejection. Some singles, especially the younger generations’ of singles, are more likely to text someone first after swamping numbers because they can avoid blatant rejection. Getting turned down via text isn’t so bad compared to getting turned down over the phone. Additionally, some singles are easily discouraged by an unanswered or unreturned phone call.

Icebreaker. Other singles use texting as a strategic first move to help break the ice before placing the phone call. The rationale behind the icebreaker text is that it increases the probability of having your phone call answered by re-establishing the initial connection that instigated the phone number swap in the first place.

Still Single? You Need To Turn Your Dating “Cab Light” On!

You have everything going for you….great career, you’re in great shape and have a great social circle. You’re pretty happy with your life, but you still find yourself wondering why you haven’t found “the one”. Does this sound familiar?

Chances are you’re among the many single men and women that find themselves hoping that Ms. or Mr. Right will walk into your life. You believe “love will just happen” or “this will work itself out.”

Unfortunately, this only happens in the movies or fairy tales. If you’re wanting to find a relationship in 2013 and improve your dating life, you need to put yourself out there. Join a club or a group where you can expand your social circle, let your personal network (friends, co-workers, family) know that you’re single and looking to meet someone, attend a singles mixer or speed dating event, go out to happy hour or join a dating service. You need to turn your dating “cab light” on!

If you’re sick of waiting for love to find you and need to get back out there, give us a call at It’s Just Lunch. Whether you’re actively dating and just have problems meeting the “right” people or haven’t dated in 25 years, we’ll help introduce you to quality matches and arrange fun, first dates and turn your dating “cab light” on! 

Forget ‘Prince Charming’ and find Mr. Right-For-You

Are you still waiting for your Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet? Dr. Michelle Callahan of Women’s Health explains how you can wake up from the fairy-tale fantasy to find real love.

This segment, featured on the TODAY show, we found gave great advice for women (and men!) who are ready to spring clean their love life. 

 

 

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